7 minutes ago
Y'all know I love Annabelle movies, Creation was awesome for the type of movie it is, and I had a great time with it. I love Patrick Wilson, I love Vera Farmiga so we're really cooking with gas here, apart from the whole no fucking Patrick Wilson and no Vera and also no real scares to speak of. Honestly what the goddamn ass were they thinking. What's funny is that you know the creators have wanted to do something with that bloody room since the first Warren movie, and they've got so many interesting artifacts and trinkets in there hat they've been just DYING to show off but little to no thought went into how best to pull that off. It ended up being too much, and also too little, all at the same time. The scariest thing in that room by far is Annabelle and the dumb demon man, so everything else was a bland appetiser for the main and short event. The ferry men were NOT scary, although I did enjoy the floating coins for eyes scene a lot, and the Shogun warrior man had absolutely nothing about him to make you feel fear. Moving an inanimate object slowly is like horror movie 101 and it was boring as fuck. Mix in the bad CG werewolf (yes we're at that stage) and the violent bride who encourages others to be violent (from the tone of my review it is probably working) and you end up with a cluttered movie that is trying to fit itself into every horror genre whilst never showing me anything horrific or terrifying. It had all the elements of a horror movie, darkness, creepy camera angles, reflections and torch scenes but none of the actual horror. The stakes were so low that they basically didn't exist and I'd be surprised if any of the core ladies made it out of that house of supposed horrors with anything more than a scratch and mild psychological trauma. I mean really??? No blood, no wounds, no death??? Is this the standard we're reduced to?? The strongest thing about the film are the three leading ladies, who all give very endearing performances that make you root for them, but against what. I've had intrusive thoughts more terrifying than this movie, I really don't understand how they thought they could pull this off.